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daydreamer

I have been dating this man for a year and a half. I am a single mom of two children and have recently graduated and am starting my next chapter in my life. I will be entering the workforce again and want to move in with my boyfriend but he is not financially stable. He is 30 years old and lives with his mother. When we first met and he told about his living arrangement I was a bit put off but tried not to judge him harshly because he explained that he was trying to pay down his student loan debt as well as some medical bill debt. However, he has not appeared to have put a significant dent in this debt. He also doesn't make a lot of money, despite the fact that he has a bachelors degree. He does not seem to be driven at all (career wise). I have tried not to judge him due to the fact that I know many people struggle with debt but he really seems to be financially inept and more so than the average person his age. Although I struggle to pay my bills, I manage them well and have very little debt, most of it being student loans. Many times he has asked to borrow money from me and rarely has he paid me back. I am worried that moving in with him will destroy me financially and then cause me to resent him. In fact, I already resent him for repeatedly asking me to borrow cash. I have thought about breaking up with him and always change my mind because he is very sweet to me and loving with me and my children. His financial problems are the only downfall he has. He has truly been a good friend to me, emotionally supportive, a passionate lover, caring with my kids, my friends and family like him and he has many friends. Is financial instability a good enough reason to end a relationship?

JustSethMe

I would suggest talking to him about it first. Put some stipulations on moving your relationship forward. For instance, "_______, I really do care about you and I want this to keep going, but for me and my kids, I really need to know that you are willing to try. Your finances really need to be in order for me to trust building a life with you." Why not suggest financial counseling? I wouldn't break it off unless you've exausted your other options, if you really want to be with this man. It's not a good example for your children to follow if he's got financial issues.

BeggingforBestAnswer

I think it could work, think about this:13 Signs Of Falling In LOVE 1. When you're on the phone with them late at night and they hangup...but you miss them already when it was just two minutes ago2. You read their texts over and over again...3. You walk really slowly when you're with them...4. You feel shy whenever you're with them... 5. When you think about them, your heart beats faster and faster... 6. You smile when you hear their voice...7.. When you look at them, you can't see the other people aroundyou... all you see is him/her... 8. You start listening to slow songs, while thinking of them... 9. They become ALL you think about... 10.You get high just from their scent... 11.You realize that you're always smiling to yourself when you thinkabout them....12.You would do anything for them...13.While reading this, there was one person on your mind the wholetime.....Any advise?http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AiQyLA7Z1OZUUsvMbLP1QFfsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid =20090601143640AAWQPlV

duminyricky

If you are truly happy with the person and see the love that you have for each other, then these should tell you as well as your instinct that he is the right one.

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