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charlie9695

My partner hung himself 10 weeks ago, and his friend and I found him and revived him. He now has brain severe damage. He has a complete personalty change and he can't even remember doing it. I know he only done it to try and gain control after an argument. I know this because his friend was inside talking to me my partner came in from outside his friend said I'll be out in a min, my partner then went out and hung himself only a few meters away from the back door so he knew he would be found. I believe I can eventually bring him home but he will be hard work and I have 3 kids the first 2 is from a previous marriage and my youngest is only 2 which is ours.His family are now trying to get guardianship (which is someone who makes decisions for someone who can't make decisions themselves and handles their finances). If they get it they want me to move closer to them and change my kids schools (which I'm not willing to do). His family don't want to look after him, they want me to do it but they want me to do it their way and if they get it I have to do what they want, so if they get it I was thinking of just walking away from my partner and start again. I feel guilty if I do because I know I'm the only one standing between him and a nursing home.I have told him what his family are doing, and how I feel about it and believe it or not he tells me he'd kill himself if he lost me. But forgets what I've told him not long laterI'm feeling very angry with my partner for doing this and putting me in this position.Am I wrong for feeling angry? Would I be wrong to turn my back on him? I don't want to leave him but I would have so much to cope with without his family telling me what to do too.I'm confused because I still really love him so much despite what he has done.

free_angel

If I had guardianship over someone other people would find out real fast we play by my rules and that I don't have to do anything I don't want to do. And I'd have no problem setting them straight on that. I'd tell them in a letter, over the phone, to their face, it makes no difference to me.

Meggie

Sorry for all that you must be a strong woman to go through this,anyway i think you should not agree on what thier family wants why dont you take control and help him get a good lawyer and talk to him about it.

AbeL

Ultimately, your children should come first. That means as the only reasonable parent, it is your responsibility to protect them from the chaos that this guy has brought into their lives.You need to separate them (and You) from this guy. Try to move on, and make sure you and your kids get some therapy. If they share his DNA, you should be aware that mental illness can be inherited, and they should be prepared to deal with the possibility that they may also feel suicidal at some point in their lives.

gmconlan

I think his family is looking for an unpaid nurse/maid/companion. I don't think the boy was all there to begin with, or he wouldn't have tried to kill himself. You've got 3 kids to take care of and you need to ask yourself if you want a 4th. Especially since the 4th is brain damaged, may not progress, and you'd be stuck with him for the rest of your life. I'd cut my ties and move on.

ouragon

I lived with a man who attempted suicide to control me. He is an abuser and he always will be.The only way to resolve this is to leave him. His family is going to make your life a living hell, imo.800.799.SAFE National Domestic Violence Hotline